Quotes About Freedom of Speech

April 7, 2018

Will elaborate.shortly:

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
― George Orwell

“The moment you say that any idea system is sacred, whether it’s a religious belief system or a secular ideology, the moment you declare a set of ideas to be immune from criticism, satire, derision, or contempt, freedom of thought becomes impossible.”
[Defend the right to be offended (openDemocracy, 7 February 2005)]”
― Salman Rushdie

“I may not agree with what you say, but I shall defend to my death your right to say it”

Evelyn Beatrice Hall

“I cannot praise a fugitive and cloistered virtue, unexercised and unbreathed, that never sallies out and sees her adversary, but slinks out of the race where that immortal garland is to be run for, not without dust and heat. ”

John Milton, Areopagitica

I now have a Twitter account: @mariecat73

and a Facebook account: Marie Louise Noonan.

please come and join me there

Love ‘rie

one thing, I wrote, just one thing and I lost a subscriber. What is going on?

 

 

 

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This Is What I Think of the Human Race

March 20, 2018

 

 

https://www.ditchthelabel.org/are-they-really-your-friend-15-signs-that-suggest-otherwise/

Fad Diet Friday

February 17, 2018

Dear subs. Or followers. Or whatevers, (I think I shall settle with the latter. Subs sounds way to mundane and I don’t need ‘followers’. I am not Jesus Christ. ) This is why I never use the abomination that is ‘Twitter’; never quite got my head round that one. So ‘Whatevers’ it shall be. No offence intended although it seems that everything you say will offend someone, somewhere on the planet and they will not hesitate to let you know about it. Another strike against Twitter. Call me a Special Snowflake (did I get that one right?) but I am neither brave enough nor masochistic enough to put myself through that.

Yes, after nearly a year I am back or ‘I’mmm back’ as Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character said in The Terminator and what better way to start than a piece called ‘Fad Diet Friday’. Yes, I am aware that it is technically a Saturday but let’s not be excessively pedantic.

Long ago I learnt that on this glorious and miraculous medium called the Internet all things are possible. You see, I am about to embark on what the young people on YouTube are calling a ‘Wright Loss Journey’, only mine is not quite so thrilling as theirs because I have only a stone and a half to lose rather than the standard three to four hundred pounds so my ‘struggle’ pales in comparison. I am no longer the woman I was when this photograph was taken in 2016. Who knew you could body shame yourself? In other words I do not look like this anymore:   https://rielouise.wordpress.com/2015/04/08/in-red/

In 2014 I had a breakdown (the last of many) and I was hospitalised. When my blood work was completed the staff started to panic. My Phlebotomist went crazy and rushed into the office and started to telephone all sorts of people. I could see her through the plexiglass window. As for myself, I was strangely numb. I wondered what all the fuss was about. I think they call this phenomenon ‘La Belle Indifference’ but don’t quote me on that. So I was rushed to hospital in an ambulance devoid of a siren, accompanied by one of the nursing assistant and I was put in a wheelchair ( yes, they do that over here now.) and taken by a porter to a ward in the bowels of the hospital. It was there that I was informed by a very serious looking doctor that I had something called ‘ pernicious anaemia. I had a cannula put into my arm. The young doctor was inexperienced and it took her several attempts to drive the thing home. Halfway through I pleaded: “It’s all right. Don’t bother. Just let me go home and I will eat whatever is necessary to put this right. I was then told that I would have to eat trucks full of iron rich food to rectify the situation I now found myself in, or rather, the situation I had put myself in.

For, without being aware of it I had been on a ridiculously unhealthy crash diet. In 2014 I withdrew from the world. I was almost a recluse. I saw few people, apart from my neighbours, my mother and my best, oldest and most loyal friend. Without knowing it I had lost a substantial amount of weight. And without noticing I was eating the bare minimum needed to keep my self alive. Rice cakes were my main source of sustenance, along with the odd chocolate bar one packet of potato chips.
In short, I lost weight by eating absolute crap. And besides all of this I took no exercise. I would market it if I could remember it. It is this experience that has stimulated my interest in fad diets. And for your benefit, but mostly my own, I shall dive headfirst into the world of nutritional quackery and dissect them, right here on my newly revived blog.

So what, you are probably wondering is this rather incoherent ramble all about. It is just a way of dipping my toe in a sea infested with sharks. Or, in my rather less melodramatic case, a pond infested with sniping goldfish. Like it or not I have returned.

Cool Shades of Blue

May 16, 2017

Screen Shot 2017-05-15 at 21.30.01

The sun, a pale yellow disk in the sky, was going down. She thought of childhood. She thought of freedom. Memories thrust themselves upon her. She did not invite them in, they simply arrived, pale ghosts wandering through her head.

Her swim in the calm sea beneath a serene sky had been all too brief. She scooped up a handful of sand and let it trickle down her leg. She wanted to make this moment forever.

She tried not to think about where the car was taking her -back to the bin. She wanted to sit here, on the back seat, forever, reassured by the comforting rhythm if the motor, travelling into an infinite golden sunset.

A place in which night was banished and sky and sea merged and she immersed herself in their cool shades of blue.

The Chemical Lobotomy

April 23, 2017

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When I was first hospitalized as a teenager, I was, or so I was told, very ill. I was experiencing delusions I would rather not discuss in any detail here. Suffice to say I was only ever a danger to myself, never to others. As a result of this, I was forced to spend six months in the local psychiatric hospital. I was heavily medicated with the most primitive antipsychotic known to man: Chlorpromazine (aka Largactil in the UK, Thorazine in the US and the Chemical Kosh/lobotomy in both countries).

Chlorpromazine was the first of a new type of medication known as ‘neuroleptics’. They were introduced in the 1950s and were the only class of medication capable of combatting the positive symptoms of schizophrenia such as delusions and hallucinations. They did not, as far as I am aware, do much for the negative symptoms.

I was reminded of this recently when I saw a documentary entitled ‘Inside Strangeways’ on Channel Five, a terrestrial tv station I rarely watch. In 1985 an infamous riot broke out in the prison. One of its triggering factors was the use of Chlorpromazine to subdue its more troublesome prisoners. They would be forcibly medicated; held down and injected. It is a horrific experience; something I have never really got over. Even though I now see that it was a tragic necessity, I still find it hard to dwell upon. The sense of violation never really goes away.

Throughout my first stay in the hospital, I was on such a high dose of Chlorpromazine that my vision was permanently clouded over. I needed Procyclidine (an anti-Parkinsonian drug) to combat the side effects of the drug I was already taking. Those were the days when the hospital staff would wake you up to give you a sleeping pill then wake you up periodically throughout the night by shining a torch into your bed space. But they were doing the best they could with minimal resources. I know that now but for a long time I resented it. Time does heal some things.

All of this happened in the early ‘90s and thankfully, over the years, much has changed. Atypical antipsychotics such as Quetiapine and Abilify have been introduced. Therapy is no longer contraindicated. People are prepared to actually talk to you nowadays. Medication is no longer the only avenue of treatment.

At the moment I am taking Quetiapine and Abilify. I am told I should be reconciled to the fact that I may have to take this combination of medications for the rest of my life. This does not sit well with me. I worry about the impact these drugs may be having on my physical health. Quetiapine has been known to indirectly lead to diabetes or liver damage. And. if you google it, you will find a list of side effects a mile long. The less serious side effects include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, drowsiness, constipation. The most serious side effects include high fever, confusion and permanent cognitive impairment (something I am terrified of.)

So I stand at a crossroads. I am tempted to simply stop taking the medication altogether so that I can be me again. But those around me say it is beneficial and I should continue taking it. I shall probably compromise and aim for the best possible results on the lowest dose of medication. This, I think, is the most sensible approach.

Volcano

April 15, 2017

volcano

Pale Morning

April 7, 2017

ontheparapet

She stands
On the parapet
Of the bridge
Staring down
At the sparkling blue
Of the water below

Her body slices
Through the stillness
Of the pale morning
At one with the air
Shimmering
And translucent

She descends,
Greeting the dawn
She is ethereal
She is a ghost
Who slips through the cracks
In your consciousness

She bids you farewell
She no longer needs you
She exists now
Only in dreams
And in fragments
Of memory

And in the stories
You whisper to your children
On long, dark winter nights

Sucked In?

April 6, 2017

macbook-select-gold-201604

My New Toy

I have recently acquired a new toy. I first saw it in the Certified Refurbished section of the online Apple Store and immediately fell in love with it. I knew I simply had to have it. My latest prized possession is a refurbished MacBook 10-inch Dual-core Intel Core M entry level model in gold; the 2015 model. I would have preferred rose-gold but that wasn’t introduced until 2016. Other colours available are silver and space grey. The price had been reduced to seventy five percent of the original.

History

My Mac history is convoluted. I purchased my first mac, a G4, back in 2006. https://rielouise.wordpress.com/2006/03/14/finally-opened/

After that I worked my way through a white MacBook and two MacBook Pros. I still use my 2012 model, the last one to sport an optical drive, as a desktop. My gateway product was the first generation iPod. That was when I became obsessed with Apple. That was when I became one of those infuriating Fan Girls who would defend the Cupertino-based company at all costs. I have matured slightly since then and I now look upon Apple (and everything else) with a more jaundiced eye.

Initial Impressions

Fast forward to last Friday: I snatched the MacBook from the hands of the delivery man and unboxed it; an almost surgical process. It is the Kate Moss of MacBooks: sleek, svelte and compact. It worked straight out of the box. Setting it up was a seamless process. It slotted neatly into my apartment’s Apple eco system. It hasn’t been out of my hands since delivery. It is cleaved to me, like an extra limb. I have hardly touched my iPad Air and barely glanced at my 2012 MacBook Pro. The latter looks ugly and chunky next to my slender new machine.

Impressive Features

It is widely acknowledged, even by the MacBook’s harshest critics, that its most impressive feature is its ultra portability. It weighs just two pounds. It feels like nothing in my backpack. So much so that I’ll pause and panic; momentarily afraid that I have lost it. It is a pleasure to carry around and I must confess I rather enjoy the admiring glances it attracts when I am typing away in the corner of some coffee shop.

There are many other features that make the MacBook a joy to use. Of course there is OSX itself (the main reason I would find it hard to go back to using a windows machine: it would feel like stepping back into another era.) I am heavily invested in the ‘Apple eco system’. I use iTunes Match, the iCloud, along with an iPhone and an iPad Air 2. Then there is its crisp, clear Retina display. Watching videos on this machine is an impressive experience, enhanced by the speakers – the best I have ever encountered on a laptop. It is also good for photo editing; my main activity on this machine. And I would imagine it would be beneficial for video editors too. And, last but not least, there is the new touch force trackpad.

Some Regrets

This is not a trivial purchase for me and I recognise that I have made some compromises. So some buyer’s remorse is inevitable. The single port caused the greatest fuss in the technology community. I am not in the habit of using peripherals so this isn’t such a big deal for me. For others though purchasing this model would be a one way ticket to Dongle Ville. I feel that Apple could have ameliorated this by including an adapter in the box, as they did with the iPhone 7. Another big issue for many is the keyboard. I am slowly getting used to it. No one denies though that the build quality is superb but is it a matter of form over function? Have I been sucked in to the Apple Reality Distortion Field? Who knows.

So would I recommend it? Not to everyone. If portability isn’t your thing, go for the MacBook Pro.

http://www.apple.com/uk/macbook/design/

Twisted Sisters

April 5, 2017

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Sunset

April 4, 2017

daughter_in_profile_by_bellarie-d70dfjcSunset

Evening and the sunset’s compress
Soothes our inflamed flesh
And I am stunned
By its sudden incandescent flare
The mud, the silt stretches for miles
Encompassing everything.
We watch the ocean rebound
Its sounds, its historic hiss
Slaughter all other sounds around
Injuring the air and to verify your existence
I grasp your hand. And above the elements
Bicker with one another and the sky
Is turning into a shade of sluttish red
Our cheeks are pinked by the wind.
And the watery colours
Bleed into one another. Diffusion –
A catalyst for confusion, for fear.
And the wind, once a gentle exhalation,
Huffs and puffs with all its might,
Grabbing hold of our hair, hauling us in.
And visions emerge from beneath the waves
Where a ship ran aground,
Where demented sailors drowned
It rises up. It bellows. A black cat shrieking,
Competing with our own blood pumping.
The gulls flee from it and fly, fly, fly into nothingness.


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