Archive for April 4th, 2005

Testing BlogJet

April 4, 2005

I have installed an interesting application – BlogJet. It’s a cool Windows client for my blog tool (as well as for other tools). Get your copy here: http://blogjet.com

“Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.” — Pablo Picasso

After Death

April 4, 2005
(Originally published on Usenet and dedicated to Sarah C R.I.P.)

Numbed.
Initially
But anger soon arrives
Always unwelcome
A corrosive sensation
And our entire bodies
Scream in unison, 'Why'
A howl is ripped from us
And rushes through the night
And flies through the universe
And reaches you
And you are finally aware
Of what you meant to us

Playing Catch-Up IV

April 4, 2005

Friday passed relatively peacefully apart from the visit from the insurance assessor. Doug turned up unexpectedly to act as a witness for me. But to be honest, he made the whole thing look rather dodgy. ‘My goodness, Doug, what are you doing here?’ At one point the assessor asked me how the fire started. How in Hades should I know? I felt like telling him I’d nipped up there and started the fire myself just to get new stuff. Instead I said (demurely), ‘I have my suspicions but to voice them would leave me open to accusations of slander* so I’d best keep them to myself.’

*as opposed to libel on here!

Burnt Out Flat

April 4, 2005

Burnt Out Flat
Originally uploaded by Bella the Cat.

As of yesterday

Disrobe

April 4, 2005

Darkness descends and we disrobe
Our roles are our attire
And now we have no need for them
What we say is not what we are
The image we present is just a facade
Why don’t we permit ourselves to be real?
Why don’t we permit oursleves to live?

I am healing now
The day is done
I stand beneath the clouds
Letting them rain on me and
My Grandmother’s ghost grasps my hand
We share our spirits and our souls
We will flee this chaotic land
And we will reign together

Playing Catch Up III

April 4, 2005

Having said all that I shall resume the summary of my week:
(if only to break the monotony of insomnia)

On Thursday I abused my prescription pills again – not all of them – just the hypnotic: Zolpidem. Not advisable, people. (Hence the insomnia and the rather incoherent entry on that day). And, as always, I lived to regret it. I had conducted substantial research into my father’s current ailments and has discovered that, in very rare cases, an aortic aneurism can be post-traumatic. My father was mugged and quite badly assaulted recently and it occurred to me that this could be the cause. I rang my mother up and she dismissed my suggestion out of hand. She is a nurse after all and is therefore omniscient. I was, admittedly, in a rather excitable state. I told her that she should at least consider the possibility because, if the assailant is apprehended, he could be charged with a more serious crime. She continued to dismiss what I thought was quite a constructive suggestion. She resorted to ridicule and the whole conversation degenerated into an argument which concluded with my slamming the ‘phone down. (Metaphorically speaking, as I have a cordless ‘phone so rather than slamming it down I pressed the ‘disconnect’ key which doesn’t sound quite as dramatically satisfying.)

She left a message on my telephone later, asking me to ‘ring her back’. I didn’t.

So all in all, not a terribly productive day. Let that me a lesson to you..I mean, to me..to whoever.

More later.

(Is that a ‘Please God, no,’ I hear?)


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